Happy best day of the week everyone! I predict that most of you to be reading this as you’re hungover and frantically setting your fantasy lineups with no idea that there are Saturday games this week. Been there, I feel the pain. As my predictions are often wrong, these power rankings with tiers and playoff contenders feel so so right.

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Week 14

Tier One – Super Bowl Bound

These are the six teams in which I could see hoisting the Lombardi. The order is set based on what I’ve seen all season and a partial bass to the trend I see set. In my honest opinion this top 6 could be in almost any order. These teams are playing their best football right now and acting like Super Bowl teams, not just now but all season. The story would be great for any of these teams. As of now I couldn’t predict it – but give me I want to see Bills vs Bengals AFC Championship & Eagles vs 49ers NFC Championship. No idea what would happen a rivalry game of Mahomes vs Allen or Burrow vs Mahomes Part IV would be sweet on the AFC side. A Cowboys vs Eagles division matchup or even a throwback Cowboys vs 49ers would be awesome.

Anyways, these are my SB favorites as of right now. A lot can change…

1. Philadelphia Eagles
2. Buffalo Bills
3. Kansas City Chiefs
4. Cincinnati Bengals
5. San Francisco 49ers
6. Dallas Cowboys 

Tier Two – Untrusting Contenders

These teams are like the hot girl you bring to the dance knowing the minute you turn your back to get more punch that she’ll be making out with your best friend (Fuck you Meagan). Nevertheless, these teams will be in the playoffs and could win at any moment, but for now whether it be because of injury, lack of cohesiveness, or just plain old ease of schedule – don’t bet on em to win it all. I very well may be eating my words come January and February, but for now don’t do it.

7. Miami Dolphins 
8. Minnesota Vikings
9. Baltimore Ravens
10. NY Jets
11. NY Giants
12. Tennessee Titans

Tier Three – Trending Up

These are three teams I see that IF they make it into the playoffs can make some serious noise. The tier above them may have a better team on paper or have been playing more complete all season, but these teams are competing hard Jesus Jones style. The Chargers are getting healthy at the right time, the Commanders are playing their best football in years despite the dumpster fire that the organization is in, and the Lions are eating Dan Campbell’s CHUNKY Soup all the way to a playoff spot. Believe it, because these teams do.

13. LA Chargers
14. Washington Commanders
15. Detroit Lions

Tier Four – Eh, What’s goin’ on down here boys?

Not really sure what to think about these teams. The Seahawks were looking like Tier Two all season and have drastically dropped, maybe they just don’t have the roster.. yet. A lot of hope for the future in Seattle, maybe they find that mojo back this year, but they’ll likely an early playoff exit at best. You can never count out Dr. Bill, but the Patriots again, just don’t seem to have it. Now, with that being said they could very easily sneak into the playoffs and give a Tier One team a punch in the mouth…but I just don’t see that happening. Right now they sit in that last playoff spot, I do not think they will make it in over both the Jets and the Chargers, but hey I’m 38 still living in my parent’s basement, so what the hell do I know? Buc’s have Tom Brady, enough said. If they find a glimmer of game, they could win it all.. Doubt it happens but they’ll probably win the division and anything can happen once you get into the playoffs, especially with TB12 on your side.

16. Seattle Seahawks 
17. NE Patriots
18. Tampa Bay Buccaneers 

Tier Five – Disgust

This is a family blog, so I will not go into depth on my pure DISTAIN that I have for both of these teams. VILLIANS! I hope they both rot into the abyss that is mediocracy forever in the ongoing storybook of the NFL. I spent too much time here – Next.

19. Green Bay Packers 
20. Cleveland Browns

Tier Six – Free for All

These teams somehow all still have a chance to make the playoffs. Now these teams should just sling it around and see what happens.. which is seemingly what they are all doing. That makes for the best football, tune into these games – bet the overs and if one of them make the playoffs look out for a blowout because none of them stand a chance.

21. Arizona Cardinals
22. Jacksonville Jaguars
23. LV Raiders
24. Atlanta Falcons
25. Carolina Panthers

Tier Seven – Praying for Heaven

If you are a fan of each of these teams I would say that going to church is a better way of spending your time than watching any of these clubs. Pray for a high draft pick and a change for next season. If you are a Saints or Rams fan, pray that your top 5 draft picks are busts for the other team. If you are a Bears or Steelers fan, pray that your young QBs take that next step in 2023. If you are a Broncos fan **takes slip of water** pray that your pick that the Seahawks own is bust, that Russ is not completely dead, that you haven’t lost the locker room, that Hackett isn’t a complete idiot, that the Mile High isn’t completely dry from the disaster that last offseason was. Ooooff. If you’re a Colts and Texans fan, pray that you find that QB in the draft or die trying.. Start pulling up the mock draft simulator because reality is dead for these teams.

26. Pittsburgh Steelers
27. NO Saints
28. Chicago Bears
29. Indianapolis Colts 
30. LA Rams
31. Denver Broncos 
32. Houston Texans 

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