It’s draft week! Stocks are rising, stocks are falling, trades are being compiled, and dreams are about to come true. This is a draft class that’s loaded with potential stars, potential busts, and boos thrown Roger Goodell’s way. Let’s take a look at who teams could look to select in round one.

1. Carolina Panthers – Bryce Young, QB, Alabama

You don’t move up eight spots in the draft and trade away the house for nothing. Carolina has been searching for an answer at QB ever since Cam Newton left town. Carolina has had a litany of attempts to find a long-term answer at quarterback, and none of them have stuck. After balling out in free agency, there is only one move left to make – quarterback. It could either be Young or Stroud here, but of late, Young’s stock has risen and Stroud’s has fallen. This QB class is full of gambles, but despite his sub-6 foot frame, Young seems to be the safest pick.

2. Houston Texans – Will Levis, QB, Kentucky

After Bryce Young, the QB class is impossible to predict, and there are question marks with all of the QBs. Will Levis has accuracy issues. Anthony Richardson may be too inexperienced. CJ Stroud scored a negative 32 on the S2 test. Each player has a high ceiling and a low floor. With that, the Texans do have a need at quarterback. With Levis being the odds on favorite to go second overall, we’ll just put him here.

3. Arizona Cardinals – Will Anderson Jr., EDGE, Alabama

On a team that needs defense, there is absolutely no shame in selecting the best player available. While Anderson is not a freak athlete, his production at Bama was undeniable. Everything about him screams “pro ready, solid NFL player”. Expect the Cardinals to shore up their defense with Anderson, assuming nobody trades up to get him.

4. Indianapolis Colts – Anthony Richardson, QB, Florida

Richardson is this generation’s Randall Cunningham. He is an elite and powerful runner, he can change the game at any moment, and he has an absolute cannon of an arm. The cannon is, however, a loose one, as accuracy is his primary concern. He also has been thought of as a one year wonder, as he only has one full year as a starter. If he can get it together, the Colts, who have transitioned between old white guys faster than Capitol Hill, will have found their man. As for the pick itself, he’s arguably the most polarizing player on the board not named Jalen Carter.

5. Seattle Seahawks (from Denver Broncos) – Tyree Wilson, EDGE, Texas Tech

The Geno Smith-led offense surprised many in 2022, and it looks like he’s here to stay for the time being. After shipping off Russell Wilson at the absolute perfect time, getting the Broncos first round pick, and building a complete roster in the process, they’re in a good place. Here, not only do they have the luxury of selecting the best player available, but the BPAs here all happen to be defensive linemen, which is a huge position of need for them. They could go with Wilson or Murphy here, but for the sake of completing a mock, they select Wilson here.

6. Detroit Lions (from LA Rams) – Jalen Carter, DT, Georgia

Carter is a freak of nature and has been compared to Warren Sapp. He was projected to be a top pick prior to his brushes with the law (which, if anything, reaffirms the Sapp comparison). Carter may be the biggest boom-or-bust player in the draft, but ceiling is off the charts. With only three interior defensive linemen under contract headed into 2023, Carter is their selection here. He’ll be expected to provide power and athleticism to the Lions’ d-line.

7. Las Vegas Raiders – Christian Gonzalez, CB, Oregon

The Raiders have secondary needs, and they seem to feel that Jimmy Garoppolo is an answer at QB for the time being. With their secondary needs, Gonzalez, who has been compared to Patrick Surtain II, would be a superb fit. They could go with the more complete corner in Witherspoon, but the Raiders LOVE to draft players based on how fast their 40 time is. Gonzalez has a 0.04 second edge on Witherspoon, so he may very well be the selection here.

8. Atlanta Falcons – Devon Witherspoon, CB, Illinois

The Falcons spent a good portion of this offseason shoring up their secondary, and we don’t expect them to slow down come draft night. They acquired Jessie Bates III, Mike Hughes, and Jeff Okudah in various deals, but there is still a need. After AJ Terrell experienced a down year, the Falcons need to acquire another high-level player such as Witherspoon.

9. Chicago Bears – Peter Skoronski, OT, Northwestern

Justin Fields was tied with Russell Wilson for being the most sacked QB in the NFL in 2022, and Wilson attempted 165 more passes. Offensive line was a clear issue in Chicago in 2022. After trading down from number one overall and committing to Justin Fields, the Bears have ample opportunity to address several needs. Skoronski went to college merely twelve miles north of Chicago. He provides a franchise left tackle option for the third year signal caller from, as Roger Goodell inexplicably puts it, “Uh-hio State”.

10. Philadelphia Eagles – Myles Murphy, EDGE, Clemson

The Saints traded this pick to the Eagles in a deal prior to the 2022 draft that we’re too tired to explain the details of. The Eagles have several defensive needs going into this year’s draft, and with an aging defensive line, they’d be wise to build for the future on defense now that their offense is solidified. Murphy is a good choice.

11. Tennessee Titans – Paris Johnson Jr., OT, Ohio State

For now, the Tennessee Titans are in Ryan Tannehill purgatory. If they don’t want it to get any worse, they need to replace the recently-departed Taylor Lewan. Johnson is a potential franchise left tackle that can immediately fill that void as the Titans figure out what to do with their quarterback situation.

12. Houston Texans (from Cleveland) – Jaxon Smith-Njigba, WR, Ohio State

Robert Woods is the default number one receiver in Houston. While Woods himself has had a very solid career, that is not a good sign for an offense. Smith-Njigba is the best slot receiver in this year’s draft. Considering Houston’s dire need at receiver, this pick would immediately start the future and get fans excited in Houston.

13. Green Bay Packers (from New York Jets) – Michael Mayer, TE, Notre Dame

The Packers have a big need for pass catchers as they usher in the Jordan Love era. Josiah Deguara is the top tight end on the Packers’ roster, and in a deep tight end class, that area absolutely must be addressed. Mayer seems to be the best and most balanced TE prospect in this year’s class and would be a wise selection.

14. New England Patriots – Quentin Johnston, WR, TCU

The Patriots have a history of making unexciting first round selections, even when the positions themselves seem exciting (am I right N’Keal Harry?). But here, excitement is needed. The Raiders signed Jakobi Meyers in an effort to continue Meyers’ tradition of providing exciting plays for the Raiders. Now, the Patriots need WR help. Johnston, who I called Johnson until literally yesterday because I’m the worst, can be a quality number one receiver for Mac and Co.

15. New York Jets (from Green Bay Packers) – Broderick Jones, OT, Georgia

The Jets have a lot to figure out on offense. The Aaron Rodgers trade drama has finally ended after it went on for what seems like an eternity. Alijah Vera-Tucker seems to be the only reliable lineman for the Jets. The organization also seems unsure as to whether or not Mekhi Becton is a long-term answer at tackle. Broderick Jones seems to be an ultra-reliable answer as the Jets figure things out.

16. Washington Commanders – CJ Stroud, QB, Ohio State

CJ Stroud was once a highly likely candidate to be taken first overall, but his stock has slipped of late due to some red flags. One in particular is that he scored an 18/100 on the S2 test, but as someone who scored an 18/100 on his fair share of tests, I empathize. Washington has had lackluster QB play since Alex Smith departed, and their QB room currently consists of journeyman Jacoby Brissett, 2022 5th round pick Sam Howell, and Jake Fromm State Farm. Washington selected the late Dwayne Haskins, another Ohio State QB, four years ago. They could follow that same pattern by rolling the dice on Stroud here. There’s also the possibility that they trade up to select him.

17. Pittsburgh Steelers – Darnell Wright, OT, Tennessee

Pittsburgh needs to protect Kenny Pickett. While their offensive skill positions steadily improved in 2022, their offensive line still has many question marks and uncertainties. Wright, who may call you a dickeater on Twitter if you aren’t careful, is an absolute behemoth who can play on either side of the line. Don’t expect Wright to fall any lower than this.

18. Detroit Lions – Calijah Kancey, DT, Pittsburgh

Any time a high-caliber defensive tackle comes out of Pitt in the next millennium, people will shout “Is he the next Aaron Donald?” to the high heavens. The Lions have a great offensive system, but have numerous question marks on defense. Kancey is a wise selection at 18 and will likely not fall any further than here.

19. Tampa Bay Buccaneers – Nolan Smith, EDGE, Georgia

Devin White may very well be on his way out of Tampa Bay, and he will be sorely missed. The Bucs are quickly becoming a team with several needs, and they may start their rebuild with one of the most important positions in the NFL – edge rusher. Nolan Smith, who was once considered a top prospect in this year’s draft, provides an answer as the Bucs rebuild their defense.

20. Seattle Seahawks – Joey Porter Jr., CB, Penn State

Like we mentioned earlier, the Seahawks have several defensive needs. Should they address their need in the trenches with their first pick, they may look to shore up their need in the secondary. Porter, a second generation player, would be a flashy and extremely solid selection for Seattle here.

           Miami Dolphins

The Dolphins do not have a first round pick in this year’s draft due to a tampering violation. Instead, Dolphins owner Stephen Ross will run up to the podium, grab the mic, yell “The election was rigged!”, and then moon a concerned crowd. Roger Goodell, along with the rest of America, will look on in horror. Security will drag Stephen Ross from the stage. The rest of the draft will proceed without incident.

21. Los Angeles Chargers – Jordan Addison, WR, USC

With Keenan Allen aging and his injury history, and with Mike Williams’ boom or bust production, the Chargers have a desperate need for stability at receiver. Addison, the Fred Biletnikoff winner from 2021, could give budding star Justin Herbert the consistency and stability that he desperately needs.

22. TRADE ALERT – Baltimore Ravens trade 22 to Dallas Cowboys for 26, 129 – Bijan Robinson, RB, Texas

Robinson is an absolute stud, and the clear best running back in this year’s class. After releasing Zeke Elliott, the Cowboys, who have a knack for making flashy moves in the NFL Draft, could look to make sure that Tony Pollard isn’t the only man in the backfield. The selection of Robinson would make Dallas’ backfield the best in the league by a considerable margin.

23. Minnesota Vikings – Deonte Banks, CB, Maryland

The Vikings will dearly miss Patrick Peterson. In a division full of teams with rising offenses, help will be needed in the Vikings’ secondary. Banks would be an excellent choice here, should the Vikings address their need in the secondary for their 23rd pick.

24. Jacksonville Jaguars – Anton Harrison, OT, Oklahoma

Jawaan Taylor departed to sign a mega contract with the reigning Super Bowl champion Kansas City Chiefs. Harrison is by no means the flashiest player in the draft, but with the Jaguars needing to continue to protect T-Law, the best available offensive tackle, regardless of who it is, should be their move.

25. New York Giants – Zay Flowers, WR, Boston College

This offseason, the Giants handed Danny Dimes a bag even though many people believe he played like one that was wet and made of paper. If the G-Men want to further invest in him, they need to give him passing help. They don’t have a clear cut number one receiver. After they let go of Kenny Golladay, who was arguably the worst free agency signing of recent memory, they need a fresh start at receiver. Zay Flowers is a solid selection.

26. Dallas Cowboys acquire 22 from Baltimore Ravens for 26, 129 – Lukas Van Ness, EDGE, Iowa

The Ravens have had a need at receiver every year since the Revolutionary War, but they may very well have addressed them with the signings of Odell Beckham Jr. and guy-you-might-have-heard-of-maybe-twice Nelson Agholor. After the departure of Calais Campbell, the Ravens will need to reinvigorate their defensive line. Lukas Van Ness is an option here.

27. Buffalo Bills – Jahmyr Gibbs, RB, Alabama

In a perfect world for Bills Mafia, Bijan Robinson will find himself available at 27. That said, Robinson is such an elite talent, that may not be the case. With the departure of Devin Singletary, the Bills have a need at running back. They can address their need at receiver in round two, but for now, they can select the Bama product here in round one.

28. Cincinnati Bengals – Dalton Kincaid, TE, Utah

Kincaid is such an elite receiving option at tight end that his serviceable blocking skills are overlooked. With the injury-prone Irv Smith Jr. and the unproductive Drew Sample as the top two options, the Bengals have a dangerously thin tight end room. They should feel blessed that this tight end class is as deep as it is. Kincaid is an elite pass catcher that, if he lives up to his potential, could help the Bengals recover after the loss of Hayden Hurst.

29. New Orleans Saints – Mazi Smith, DT, Michigan

The Saints rush defense significantly worsened in 2022 from 2021. Mazi Smith has been described as a physical freak who fills one of the Saints’ biggest needs.

30. Philadelphia Eagles – Brian Branch, S, Alabama

Branch is, by a considerable measure, the best safety in the 2023 class. After losing CJ Gardner-Johnson to the Lions, they have a hole in their secondary that can very easily and quickly be fixed with Branch, should he pan out.

31. Kansas City Chiefs – Will McDonald, EDGE, Iowa State

After losing three-time Pro Bowler Frank Clark to free agency, the Chiefs may look to replace his production in a division full of offensive firepower. McDonald has been praised for his pass rushing abilities, which could very much tempt the Chiefs to take him with the final pick in the first round.